It’s Month 4 of my Travels and I Want to Burn All my Clothes.

On a whim, I have decided to write a bit of a travel reality story here. Sure, lately I have been focusing a lot on practical travel content and photography, but it’s been a while since I really poured my heart out to you guys on here. So, I figured that now is that time.

I’ve been on the road for over 4 months now. I have been through literally EVERY kind of weather imaginable on this trip – from freezing mountains to blistering hot beaches. And, naturally, I had to pack for all of these weathers.

When you have to pack for every kind of weather imaginable, into one bag, that basically leaves half and half for each kind of weather. All my cold weather clothes just sat there when I was froclicking around Panama and Costa Rica in a bikini, and all of those clothes (anything that bares even a shoulder, which is a lot) are now gathering dust in my backpack while I literally rewear pretty much all of my cold weather clothes… every…. single… day.

Now, I knew I would be traveling through winter countries. I planned for it. I even wanted to do it. Being from sunny California, winter is honestly a wierd kind of luxury for me. Like many Californians, I think rain is exciting, and snow makes me giddy like a little child. So, when planning my travels, while trying to use a bit of common sense and go to certain places (like Patagonia) before the dead of winter, I allowed my indefinite South American backpacking route to fall in many places in the winter. I was happy about it.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BjAvo9DHysI/?taken-by=kimmconn

The famous orange jacket. It’s literally shaped like a box.

I was happy in Patagonia, hiking through wind and snow in my athletic tights, layers of very basic long-sleeved tees, and oversized hiking coat. I was comfortable. I was warm. These things are acceptable in Patagonia, or anywhere in the mountains really. It was great. You can see the same exact goddamn orange jacket (that I actually got for $7 at a garage sale) in every single one of my Instagram photos. And you know what? I think it looks fine.

But, the problem came when, after a month of being a mountain hobo, I re-entered actual civilization. Yep, that’s right, I ended up in actual cities where people do things like go to work every day and go to clubs at night and wear fairly fashionable clothing.

So I rocked up to a capital city in the same exact jacket and beanie I have been wearing for months (actually probably still in my hiking boots) like HEEEEEEY, I’m HEEEEEEEERE! (picture me as an actual messy-haired hobo in dirty clothes and a confused smile on my face, stepping off the bus in “Paris of Latin America” Buenos Aires, walking past all these beautiful Argentinian girls wearing cute scarves and jackets that actually fit them. And cute leather boots.

Toto, we’re not in Patagonia anymore. Or Panama. We’re in Buenos Aires… in winter.

Now, I’m being a bit dramatic – I’m really never one to compare myself to others or really care about what I am wearing (I mean, have you seen my instagram stories? I don’t really wear makeup and you will know that I really have no shame exposing each and every angle of solo travel). But, I really do appreciate to look a little bit cute once in a while, and with only converse, running shoes, and hiking boots, this was going to be a bit of a battle.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BjiJkKUn3RA/?taken-by=kimmconn

Surprise! Orange again.

I ignored the problem for ages, matter-of-factly telling myself I really don’t care how I look and that what I have is fine. Which is mostly true. But when I was getting ready for a night out and found myself staring at the same two far-too-casual yet slightly-passable-for-cute tops for the 18th time, one of which still smelled like smoke from my last night out, a realization passed over me which often passes over backpackers when they have been on the road for more than a month:

“I want to burn all my clothes.”

Yes, it’s true. I don’t want to wear this god damn pair of slightly-short tights ever again, because I have been wearing them every three days for months. I don’t want to wear the same sheer and slightly-too-cold-for-these-temperatures dress on another night out, with said slightly-short tights because they kindof go together.

If I want to look like a functioning member of society, the only pair of shoes I have for this are my converse. I have been wearing these stupid shoes every. single. damn. day. They aren’t even that comfortable, but is wearing hiking boots around Buenos Aires normal? No. Would it look good in photos? Abso-freaking-lutely-not. I just wish I had a cute pair of leather boots that would magically squeeze down into nothing and fit in my backpack. Is that too much to ask?

I don’t want to wear the same one pair of slightly-loose jeans anymore. I just don’t. I don’t want to wear the same three layers of jackets over a rotating bottom layer, and these warm long sleeved shirts I bought for Patagonia make me look like a fool in Buenos Aires.

I may be practical, BUT I JUST WANT TO LOOK KINDOF CUTE OKAY?!?!?! JUST ONE TIME.

It doesn’t help that winter is, well… VERY WINTERY. Like, it’s goddamn cold. I even got my beanie back out this week. Yes, the same one. Fashion goes by the wayside when you have to put on everything in your backpack every day anyways. Yep, same cardigan. Same jean jacket… and you guessed it, SAME BIG ORANGE.

And you know when this sucks even more? When you’re a travel blogger. Travel bloggers like myself are meant to capture the most beautiful aspects of each destination, to share with you lovely people over the interwebs. I usually love to do this. I consider myself the self-timer kween, and have gotten some pretty rad photos of myself doing fairly cool things in reasonably cool places, because of my skillz at making anything and everything into a tripod, then running in front of my camera and striking a pose.

But when I am cold as actual balls, in front of a beautiful view, wearing the same tights, same jacket, and my converse (because they are the only non-athletic shoes I currently own), I find myself thinking,

“Is there even a point? Does my cold and hobo self, standing in front of the camera in my orange jacket for the 178th time, even enhance the view whatsoever?!?!?!”

It’s still unclear. Will it even get likes? Maybe, maybe not. If I had a flowy beautiful dress, then it might. And I would enjoy taking photos like that if it was, say, at least 20 degrees C higher.

But, as I sit here with a red cold nose, reluctant to remove my beanie (yes, the same one) or even my orange jacket (yes, the same one) to get a tiny bit of a different color in my feed, I feel the wind creeping through my clothing. I release a big sigh, pat myself on the back for trying, and yet again, decide:

“Nope.”

https://www.instagram.com/p/BjI1NUmFH0z/?taken-by=kimmconn

Guess what color? Orange.

I’ve even allowed myself to wander through some shops recently. I’m definitely on a budget, but there seems to be an increasingly large space in it to go toward any sort of new, cuter, photogenic clothing. So far, I’ve got nothing that meets my financial or instagram needs. But if you see something new in my feed, you’ll know I hit the jackpot. 😛

So, my lovely friends, I hope you have enjoyed my rant and maybe even let out a bit of a giggle. When you see a lack of super travel blogger-y photos from me in the next few weeks, refer to this post and I hope you’ll understand (but let’s be real, I’ll still be trying…. just prepare for a lot of my staple big orange jacket and beanie. You’ve been warned.)